Food Emporium Friday

The Food Emporium announces its weekly sales every Friday. And every Friday, Two, Cheap thumbs through the circular to see what's noteworthy. Here are her picks. 

As this is our very first installment of "Food Emporium Friday," I guess I have some 'splaining to do. Every Friday, The Food Emporium--a grocery store chain based here in NYC--posts its weekly sales. The sales are only good for Food Emporium cardholders (it's a free rewards card, not a credit card--and it's totally worth signing up for), and items tend to go fast. As living in NYC often means that I have no idea when I'll be home and cooking, I usually only stock up on those sale items with long shelf-lives: canned veggies, pasta, frozen goods etc. Those are generally what I'll list in this column, though I will add other great deals on fresh produce/meats if they catch my eye. So, without further ado, here are the highlights:

BUMBLE BEE SOLID WHITE TUNA-- 2 for 3$ (you save $1)

RONZONI PASTA -- Select Varieties, 99 cents (you save $1)

DEL MONTE CANNED TOMATOES -- 2 for $3

PURDUE OVEN STUFFER ROASTER--99 cents per pound (save $1. 30 per pound)

*DOUBLE STUFF OREOS--$3.99 (save $1.70 each)

ARNOLD WHOLE GRAIN BREAD--$2.99

* you know you want them....

Check out the deals yourself, by clicking here. 

Cheap Eats

At left, Amber Sushi on the UES.

Once again, Restaurant.com is offering another 80% off sale on their (already discounted) restaurant gift certificates--just enter the code DINE at checkout.  You can get $100 worth of certificates for just 8 bucks!

I LOVE DRUGS (TORES)

My cousin--the very same one who scored us a free bottle of wine the other night--just sent me the coupon above with a note that said "My Valentine's gift to you: discounted toilet paper." I seriously don't think I could love her any more than I do right now. Because nothing makes me happier than cushy, double-quilted, aloe-infused T.P.   ...Too much information? Probably, but still: Charmin makes my heart sing. 

Anyway, print out the coupon (or just ask your store manager for one) and head to your nearest Duane Reade for 20% savings February 14th-16th. Click on this link here to see the other great deals Duane Reade has going on this week. 

Consumer Reports Bucks Starbucks

How innerestin': Last week, Consumer Reports did a blind tasting of a number of ground coffees, and Starbucks scored lower than many brews half its price. According to the NY Daily News: 

"The magazine's independent testing firm tested 19 ground coffees and reported that pricey Starbucks Coffee Colombia medium ($11.53 per pound) didn't even place among the top regular coffees, and it trailed among the decafs. Eight O'Clock Coffee 100% Colombian (at a wallet-friendly $6.28 a pound), was judged the hottest ground coffee of all, winning CR's 'Best Combination of Taste and Price.' Testers raved that the coffee possesses 'a complex blend of earthy and fruity, with a bright, pleasing sourness.'

In the decaf arena, Folger's ($8.55 a pound) won similar raves from CR."

My dad's an ardent Starbucks fan and my love of the brand has been documented here before. I'll definitely have to arrange a blind taste-test of my own.

Coke Fiend

No matter how hard I try to break the habit, I cannot for the life of me stop drinking Coca-cola. I love everything about it: the bubbles, the slightly metallic sting as it hits the back of your throat, the relative naughtiness of it all ("It's the single worst thing for you!" nutritionists exclaim; "Think of your teeth!" dentists everywhere warn).

How pleased was I, then, to see that Duane Reade is currently selling two 12-packs of the stuff for the low, low price of $7. That's a little over $.29 a can--and a deal I certainly will not be passing up. 

You'll need a Duane Reade card (not a credit card--just a shopper rewards card. It's free after you fill out a form and, if you don't have one, you should get one immediately: the place has sales galore but you only get the sale price with your card). And you'll need to get there quick. The sale ends tomorrow. 

Cheap Cheat

At left: Me too, Oprah. Me effing too. 

You guys? I have a problem. And her name is Oprah. 

I rarely miss her show, and I have no idea why I tune in at 4pm other than, you know, Law & Order just ended and there's no way in hell I'm going to sit through an episode of Charmed on TBS. And while most house-bound women fall under the spell of big O and have no problem whatsoever watching the show, I always have difficulty. Like, the time a couple weeks ago when she did an expose on overweight kids? And showed the things they ate? It made me sad, yes, but it also.... made me hungry. As in, I ate a block of cheese, chugged a coke, and then had two slices of leftover pizza hungry. 

And besides sabotaging me diet-wise, O always makes me want to slit my wrists. I don't know if it's the economy or what, but everything this woman talks about these days is suicide-inducing, gloomy stuff. Take today's show, for example, which was all about why men cheat. It was MISERABLE. And so now I am miserable and JESUS. [Siiiiiiiiiiggggggghhhhhh.]

I may need a nap. But before I hide under the covers and NEVER COME OUT AGAIN, I thought I'd relate that from now until tomorrow at some point--I can't even remember because I am now so depressed--Oprah is giving away free, downloadable copies of M. Gary Neuman's "groundbreaking" [her words, clearly] book, The Truth About Cheating. So, if you're interested in a copy, go here and get one. 

Remember when Oprah gave away cars? That was nice...

Cheap Meat

At left: Nice hat.

Tom Colicchio, of Top Chef fame and of the -Craft chain of restaurants, is opening a new, discounted meat emporium, appropriately called "Halfsteak." According to Crain's New York: 

"Halfsteak will serve a menu of small plates, sandwiches, "small pots" and half order steaks, all for under $15. The menu also includes individually sized desserts like cupcakes and ice cream sandwiches, as well as half pints of beer for $4 and specialty cocktails, such as My Better Half, for $7.50. The space has 44 seats, including 12 at the bar." 

Sounds promising, though the restaurant's MeatPacking district locale (its slated to open on Tenth Avenue and 15th Street), is slightly unappetizing to an Upper East Sider like myself. I guess I'll just have to wait and see what the reviews say: if it's not "half"-bad (it's almost 5pm, my ability to withstand the cheesy pun evaporated hours ago), I may actually make the trip.